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The author writes, "I become aware of my patience, as if it's a commodity I'm spending. I don't know how much I have." And after this unsatisfactory exchange, his father says, piteously, "I want to go home."
Joseph soon has Alzheimer's diagnosed, but he is not an ordinary patient. First, although he forgets some things, he never forgets his prodigious good manners and he also retains vast chunks of a fine education. He had a long career working for Henry Luce at Life magazine and later was co-founder of two hardcover magazines, Horizon and American Heritage, which were very successful in the mid-20th century. In other words, he was at the center of American cultural life, and he carries these attributes into his illness. He may be reduced to wearing adult diapers, but he invariably says thank you when someone has to change them.
John, because he's a writer, thank God, has decided to record the life he and his father are spending together. His other project may be something deeper. John has always been a great admirer of his mother, who went to med school after she married, became a successful doctor, but also had a series of affairs and eventually left his dad, only to be jilted by her lover as they were finally moving in together.
At length, Joseph dies at home, with his son as witness. This memoir is far too elegantly written to ever state it directly, but the reader is made aware of the high honor involved: The author honors his father in the most profound way and is blessed, in turn, by participating in the most taxing event in his father's life.
Copyright 2009, The Washington Post. All Rights Reserved.
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